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A Simple Way to Jumpstart Your Reading

Simple Way to Jumpstart Your Reading

Soooo… I do this thing.

I do this thing where I stop reading for a few days, and those days turn into weeks, and all of a sudden I have no idea what I was reading and I’m completely out of the habit. I really, really hate it.

But over time I’ve found a trick to kickstart things when I’ve been away from reading for a time. If you can relate, give this a try next time and let me know what you think.

  1. Find a book (suggestions from friends or other trusted sources are best) that is fun and easy-to-read and fast-paced. This might even be a book you’ve read before that you know you’ll enjoy and will move through quickly. You want a page-turner of a book whose content won’t frustrate you. (Think Gregor or TFIOS)
  2. Find a single time slot in your week when you can kick back and enjoy yourself for 30 minutes or so. Maybe this is in the morning before the house is abuzz, or under a tree while the kids play on the playground. Perhaps the forecast calls for rain Thursday and during the kids’ quiet time you can sit by the window and cozy up. Or maybe you ride the metro to work and can use your commute to read. Just think of when this time might be, and make yourself a note to sit down and read at that time.

Hopefully this single 30-minute slot will get you far enough into the book that you’ll naturally finish it sooner than later. If it doesn’t, find another 30-min slot and repeat.

3) When you’ve finished the book, assess how you’re feeling about your reading. Are you ready to tackle that book on finances or de-cluttering or or parenting or your spiritual life you’ve been meaning to get to? If so, dive in! If not, plan to start another quick read. If you just read a book from a series, go on to the next one. Or you could read something else from that author, or get a suggestion from a friend. The main thing is to start another book soon.

That’s it. Are you surprised?

Here’s why it works. When you pick the right sort of book, you trick yourself into reading more. The thirty minutes you devote on the first day is enough to get you hooked, and once you’re hooked, you’re on your way to carrying a book with you, looking for spare moments to sneak in a few more pages. Within a few days, you’ve been reading. (Hey! You’re reading!) And the practice of having a book around plus the momentum you’re gaining go a long way toward keeping the party going.

The only challenge I’ve found to this technique is that it’s counter intuitive. Even though I’ve reliably used it several times before, it’s hard to imagine that re-reading the Hunger Games could possibly be the best next step toward my actual goal of finishing The Histories by the end of the year. But like many things in life (think exercise), reading begets more reading. And if I can’t muster up the willpower to dive in to that work of non-fiction that’s been sitting on my shelf all year, easy-fiction somehow bridges the gap to get me there.

Of course, no technique is a magic pill. If you want to keep reading after your jumpstart, you’ll have to be mindful. Start that next book right away. Ask around what people are reading. Start talking books with your friends; you can discover good titles this way and if they are excited about books, you might find their interest contagious.

Good Luck!

Toasts, Eulogies, and Other Honoring Speeches: An Easy Two-Step How To

Cheers! (from www.bradyblack.net)Have you ever been traumatized by the thought of giving a toast or having to stand up and say something about a friend at a party? If so, I’ve got just the thing for you. A quick, easy, two-step, way to put together an honoring speech, even at a moment’s notice.

Recently my mother-in-law was preparing to give a eulogy at her mother’s memorial service; she had gathered memories and favorite stories from the kids and had come to that difficult moment of trying to put it all together. And something occurred to me that I wish would have popped into my brain a dozen years ago. An easy way to prepare a toast, eulogy, or other honoring “speech” that will get you through the crisis phase in no time at all.

Now, this is the very basic of templates. A map that will take you from 0% to 85% of  a solid honoring speech. For the finer points, keep looking. For toasts, I highly recommend the Art of Manliness article about giving a great toast as a best man. It covers the finer points of this art and gives great guidelines and reminders for all sorts of toasts.

As you prepare, I suggest capturing thoughts and notes on paper. It will keep you from trying to keep it all straight in your head, and a second draft can serve as a cheat sheet. Shall we begin?

How to do it

1) Make a list of favorable characteristics of the person you’re speaking about.

Be sure to include something that speaks to the “heart” of the individual. As the wife of a dude who is regularly remembered for being quite funny and a great storyteller, I know that when this is the only thing people compliment him on, he wonders if he actually contributes anything else to the world. Everyone likes to know they’re enjoyed. Definitely talk about that. But also mention how generous the person is, or how they are always the first to serve, or that they are tender-hearted, or whatever.

2) Pick two or three things from your list (depending on how much time you’re given for your speech and your propensity for being long-winded) and think of anecdotes or examples of that characteristic.

If you’re talking about the person’s generosity, tell about the time they had pizza delivered to your house during a particularly trying time. If you’re taking about what a prankster they were, tell about how they put your office phone in a full mold of jello. But not in front of the boss.

Which leads me to this reminder: always consider your audience and whether your statements might offend someone, get the honored person into any trouble, or cast them in a negative light.

If in doubt, ask the person (or for a memorial service, ask the person’s immediate family) if they mind. “Hey, I was thinking about what I might say tomorrow night and wanted to run something by you. Do you mind if I share the story about sneaking out to go get frosties at the 24-hour Wendy’s the night before graduation? Your mom already knows about that, right?” Something like that will do just fine.

That’s It!

That’s it. Two easy steps. And you can reverse them, too. If you have a favorite story you want to tell, start with that and figure out what it is about your friend that made those times so great. Was it their spontaneity? Their availability? Their kindness? Now you have your characteristic and your anecdote.

Sandwich your positive characteristics and anecdotes between an intro and a closing (definitely see that art of manliness article for tips on transitioning to a toast), and include thanks to those in attendance and/or for the opportunity to share about the honored person. Voila!

Oh! And know how you’re going to land the plane

One final tip. Before you get up to speak, have in mind how you’re going to finish your speech. It’s easy to rattle on for several minutes after you’re done simply because you haven’t found a stopping point. So practice ahead of time a closing statement and use it. You will feel less awkward and everyone will appreciate your succinct closure.

What do you think?

Would this one-two method work for you? Do you have any additional tips? Please share!

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Public Bathrooms 101 (or Whatever Happened to Knocking?)

Show of hands. Who here has recently had someone turn the knob on them in a public bathroom without knocking first?

Okay, hands down.

Who here can remember the last time someone actually knocked to announce their presence while you were using a public bathroom? Anyone?

Of course I’m talking about the one-unit bathrooms here, not those with lots of doors whose locks never work anyway. In the several-stalls variety, people generally seem to at least attempt foot-gazing before pushing your door in.

When I was growing up I was taught to knock on a closed door. Front door, bedroom door, bathroom door, whatever. This still seems courteous to me, not to mention its aid in avoiding, um, uncomfortable situations.

So whatever happened to knocking on the doors of public bathrooms before attempting entry? I might understand if said offenders were unattended children. I did plenty of the mom’s-not-looking-so-I-can-stop-following-her-instructions business. But people older than me? Really?

But as I was thinking about this today after getting the knob-turn-scare for the umpteenth time recently, I realized that… guh!… there are times when I don’t knock before turning the knob. What’s gotten in to me!? I’m an almost-peeping-tom AND a hypocrite!

Okay, there are occasions when I try the handle before knocking because I know I won’t be able to hear the occupant anyway. Music and ruckus are unbearably loud in too many places these days and I’ll let them play the scapegoat for some of this. But what about the other times? The truth is… well… I just. don’t. know.

What I do know is that one day when my heart isn’t as healthy as it is now, someone is going to suddenly try the knob while I’m midstream and the resulting jump in my startled heart is going to stop it cold. Then that no-knocker is going to have to find the management after she’s been holding it for ten more looooong minutes and together they will discover granny keeled over half-naked, drenched in her own pee. Genuinely lovely sight, I assure you.

So in hopes of not provoking said granny situation, I’m going to force myself to practice knocking again. If I don’t hear a response, I will do what, not being an exhibitionist and all, I would prefer being done for me: I’ll slowly turn the handle, slowly push the door forward with my eyes down, and actively listen for someone to panic on the other side. I think this might avoid unpleasantries in loud ruckus-y situations as well.

All this talk of public bathrooms has given me the uncontrollable urge to wash my hands. While I do that, holla back…

Do you knock? Does no-knocking bother you? And for goodness sake, if you’ve had someone barge in on you recently, tell, tell, TELL!

 

Council vs. Counsel (and Councilor vs. Counselor)

Luckily, it’s unlikely to get caught mistaking council and counsel in conversation. Ah, glorious homonyms!

The downside to homonyms, however, is that getting them right when it matters is elusive. This is in part because you don’t have to distinguish between alternatives in everyday use, and also because spell-check won’t correct misuse. So it’s all on you to get it right. For many of us this spells danger.

Of course no one cares if you misspell words when commenting on blogs or txtng ur bff. But if you’re writing a report for your boss? Well, it’s probably better to not draw negative attention to yourself.

Council and counsel are particularly troublesome because while we don’t write them much in everyday digi-correspondance, they pop up in work-related writing relatively frequently. So make a special effort to use/spell it correctly when it counts.

Simplistically,

  • Council with “ci” is a group that administrates (a noun).
  • Counsel with “se” is either advice (the noun) or to advise (the verb).

A related distinction of equal importance is between councilor and counselor.

  • A Councilor is a member of a council.
  • A Counselor is a person giving advice.

I’ve never heard an easy way to remember this, but I’m throwing this one out there for scrutiny.

Perhaps we can remember by way of councilor/counselor; councilors (“ci”) govern [ci]vilians, while counselors (“se”) [se]ll their services to people who need them.

As with all tricky words and usages, the easiest thing is just to remember that council and counsel are easily mistaken, and to double check yourself when it matters.

Does anyone have a better way that they remember the difference in usage/spelling between counsel and council? I’m sure this can’t be the easiest way…

 

Thanks. And the Last Minute Girl.

Thanks for being patient with the silence this past week. My husband’s grandmother passed away in the wee hours Saturday morning and I have been trying to make myself available to the family in every possible way.

Whoever “everyone” is, I am assured that they know a real blogger has posts in the chute to cover for a few days while they deal with the unexpected. Well, it’s time I confessed something. I am a last-minute girl. Have been my whole life. (Well, when I’m not a “aahhhh, forget it” girl, I’m a last minute girl.) I’m not late so much as I am dancing about with other things until the very last minute.

This is something I’ve really been working on in Year of the Grown-Up. I don’t want to be scrambling at the last minute for my whole life, and if changes are going to be made, they will come as all do: slow and tedious.

I’ve made some progress on this front, though; I am now regularly packed for travel about one hour before leaving the house instead of one minute before. Celebrate the little successes, right?

But I’m new to regular blogging, and still have a long way to grow. Hence the short hiatus in posts this past week. Meanwhile I’ve been learning a lot of grown-up-world things as I join the family in taking care of the details that follow a death.

We’ll jump back in with regular posts on Monday, when I’ve slept a bit more. Until then, I’d be interested to hear what thoughts and questions you have relating to bereavement…

Is there something that you always find awkward, or something people have done or said to you in a time of loss that was completely unhelpful or insensitive? Or perhaps was the exact right thing?

 

3 Ways to Stay: Travel Lodging Alternatives

Travel LodgingThis week I have travel on the mind again. The death of a loved one is coming soon, and so is my departure to the states.

This wasn’t a total surprise, but the timing of the matter resulted in the shuffling of other plans, and now I’m in that oh-my-gosh-there-is-so-much-to-be-done state that precedes traveling suddenly. So, it looks like more travel bits for you this week. Thanks for your patience with that; you have my word this won’t turn into a travel blog.

Last week’s Tips for Traveling on a Budget included some resources for lodging, transportation, food, and activities. Today I’m sharing three (more) resources for lodging. These may not fit your needs for one reason or another, but by knowing about them, you can consider them as options when the time is right. Or at least pass along the info to someone else. They’ll thank you for it.

1) Hostels

A classic choice for the student crowd, but many now offer single and double rooms as well. We have used Lonely Planet Guidebook recommendations and been consistently happy with the results. Nowadays you can also use Hostels.com, which has over 36,000 hostels listed from all around the world.

2) Rent Apartments or Homes by the Week

Renting by the week can offer serious discounts while providing you with a fully-furnished place all to yourself. There are many sites that offer rentals by the week (like airbnb that I mentioned last week), but this one comes recommended from a friend who has used them in the past: Vacation Home Rentals

3) Housesitting

Okay, there’s a little more to getting your foot in the door on this one, but if it ever meets your needs, it’s certainly worth exploring because it’s free. This is my go-to article about housesitting, in which a veteran house-sitting couple explains the things they get asked about most frequently. They recommend TrustedHouseSitters.com and have special offer for them at the bottom of the post.

Sooo…

Next time you need something besides your standard hotel, give one of this week’s ideas a try. And let me know how it goes!

Have you used any of the above for travel lodging? What was your experience? What are your go-to resources?

(I’ve been posting other travel articles and resources on Twitter and Facebook. Be sure to check them out if you’ve got travel on the brain.)